Ah, the dual life of a single mother – by day, a full time employee, bill payer, grocery shopper, chef, chauffeur, teacher, therapist and bedtime storyteller. By night? Well, still all those things, just with a little extra exhaustion and a cold cup of coffee I forgot to drink seven hours ago.
Meanwhile, somewhere out in the wilds of social media, my son’s father, who shall henceforth be known as “Super Daddy”, is thriving….in the comment section. Oh yes, ladies and gentlemen, he may not have the time and energy to, you know, actually parent, but boy does he have time to post about it. Or rather, his fiance has the time.
Welcome to Super Daddy: The Social Media Phenomenon.
Super Daddy is the type of dad who calls once a week (give or take) and expects a round of applause. After all, that’s all parenting is about. Ok ok, when he’s around his (future) in-laws, he calls a bit more because well, we have got to keep up with the appearances. He’s more of a seasonal character than a consistent role model. Oh but on Instagram and TikTok, Baby he is on Full dad mode. Is it the birthday on the yacht? The Christmas family Photo shoot? oh yes, I saw them all. My friends did and so did twenty thousand strangers on the internet. Did I forget to mention that I am completely against posting kids on social media? But hey who needs to consider and respect my boundaries.
And hey, he stopped working in January – news that, funnily enough, he just now decided to share. I’m not saying he planned it like a dramatic season finale reveal, but the timing is chef’s kiss. Oh and by the way “no child support will be coming from my side until I am back to working etc.” Sir this isn’t the first time and you weren’t really paying a significant amount before either, so what’s new?
Now in the spirit of accountability, I can’t say I didn’t see the signs. That’s the tragic part. I used to wear glasses and somehow I still missed those damn signs. I guess I am in the Deadbeat Dad Olympics: Gold Medalist Edition.
And Now, you may ask? I suppose, he’s retired from working (early pension perhaps?) and officially retired from contributing to our Child’s well-being. I didn’t realize fatherhood came with PTO and unlimited vacation time. Must be nice. I wanna be a dad when I grow up.
Meanwhile in the real world, while Super Daddy is busy collecting imaginary best dad awards, I’m over here:
- paying 99,99999% of everything (the 0,1% is me being generous for the insufficient child support and the electric truck he bought 3 years ago)
- juggling work, school drop-offs, bills and bedtime stories with the grace of a very tired circus performer
- trying not to laugh (or cry) at his audacity while scrolling through his fiance’s praises and posts about how amazing her man is. “what being rich really means” is the caption. No ma’am, if he was rich he would pay his child support, be a present parent and contribute to his son’s upcoming birthday. clearly he broke. Ok ok, now I’m being petty. they are rich in Jesus name.
Unfortunately there’s no customer service line for co-parents like this. No refund policy, no trade-in programs. I can’t just walk into a store and say “Hey this one is defective. Can I get a responsible one instead?”
The Silver Lining? Well, at the end of the day, I may be exhausted, I may be frustrated and I may have started talking to my coffee mug like it’s my therapist but I’m still here. Haven’t ran mad yet. I’m still showing up and my son? He has a consistent parent, love and security. In real life, not on social media.
So, to all the other single moms out there dealing with their own version of super Daddy: I see you. I am you. And if nothing else, We can at least laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. Because honestly? If I don’t laugh, I might just cry.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a job to do, a child to raise and lastly go laugh at myself for my poor choices in men. While wearing prescription glasses. Four eye, a supposed good intuition and still chose wrong. I’m changing to contact lenses now. They may just help me see better cause them glasses were a waste of money. The saddest part tho, despite our different flaws, he was not a terrible partner.
One day at a time 