Let´s talk GASLIGHTING

Do not get me started on this form of abuse because…….CHILE! Gaslighting is a form of manipulation used by an abuser/ Narcissist to make you question your reality, therefore gaining power over you. You question your thoughts, your sanity, you question everything. Do not underestimate this form of abuse because honey it works and sometimes you do not even realize that you are being gaslighted until much later.

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation and emotional abuse. The gaslighter avoids responsibility for their toxic behavior by lying & denying & making you question facts, your memory & your feelings […..]

Karen Salmansohn

Gaslighting may come in different ways such as:

1. They lie. Boldly for that matter. They want to sow a seed of confusion in you and in others.
2. They will discredit you. Yes! To the point where you start asking yourself if you are crazy.
3. They will bluntly deny it too. An abuser will deny, deny, deny even when there is evidence.

There are so many other points that can be mentioned when it comes to this form of abuse but those three apply to me. And no, I did not realize it at the time but trust me I have had my series of “am I mad?”, “am I exaggerating?”, “am I acting out for no reason?”. No darling you are not mad, you are not crazy, and you are certainly not exaggerating anything!

How I dealt with it and still deal with it (which works for me), is that I spoke to a few trusted people. Explain the situation as closely as it gets (because you know we all got our own versions) and just listen to what these people had to tell me. People with your best interest at heart will not lead you astray. After speaking about whatever situation it is at the time, for my own sanity I severe contact and/ or create boundaries. Severing contact with certain people has been one of the best things I have done for my mental health this year. Whenever a situation comes up, where I am sure I am being gaslighted, it takes me back to a different situation, where I did not realize I was being gaslighted and for a moment I doubt myself, but I snap out of it and I trust myself and once more I speak to a friend about it again. Trust me, speaking to a close friend and reconnecting on a deeper level goes a long way.

So, my lovelies whenever you feel gas-lighted, I hope you recognize it and take the necessary steps that work for you. Your mental health is a priority and not a luxury! Now chin up and read Isaiah 41:10.